I bought a new torture device. Okay, okay. It's a bra. Actually, it is a strapless convertible bra attached to a bodysuit. In any case, the thought behind the garmet is a good idea. Not so hot was the execution of the idea.
Let's start with the obvious: if you're going to make a bra/underwear thing like this you have to make it so that the woman can fasten the damned thing herself. I opened the package and looked at it. It's sleek black, glistening fabric. It is very pretty.
I slipped the thing up over my hips and up to my boobs, and then I tried to attach the clips in back, because, unlike a normal bra, you can't fasten it in the front and then pull it around. It simply don't work that way.
You'd have to be a damned contortionist to get this thing hooked up by yourself. After several fruitless minutes of trying, I finally unsnapped the crotch (yes it has a snap-closed crotch), hoisted it up, and tried again from a different angle. No luck getting the hooks fastened in back, again.
So, I tried to re-snap the crotch. After fiddling around with it for probably 5 minutes, I got down on the floor and tried. Nope. Not gonna work. So, I bent WAAAAAY over to have a look down below. And damn it all if they weren't BLACK snaps on the damned thing, so you can't even SEE them to get them re-snapped.
So, fine. I take the whole thing off and examine the snaps. They're not even real snaps. They're more like little plastic blobs with corresponsing little plastic holes surrounded by fabric. They are not even close to being a design with which a woman could feasibly fasten herself while wearing it... which brings up the question: what if you did - miraculously and theoretically - manage to get the thing fastened in the back by yourself and then you went out somewhere in it... what if you had to pee???? You'd NEVER get that thing snapped back up without an assistant, which, now that I think about it, opens up a new job title in the personal assistant marketplace: Bodysuit Crotch Snap Fastener Assistant. Probably pays AT LEAST $10 an hour.
But I digress. Even when you're not wearing the thing, getting the snaps hooked back up is no small feat. it requires the use of a vise, pliers, both hands, and the gravitational pull of Jupiter to snap back together.
After a few minutes of dinking with it, I finally have the crotch re-assembled, and go in for another attempt at fastening the back. After tilting this way and that and bending my arms in ways they were never intended to bend, I finally got it put together... kind of. I got the bottom one hooked up just fine, but then I got the top one hooked onto the second rung, leaving the second hook without a place to go and strange bulge in the hook and eye system in the back. Bollocks.
But I left it for a while, because it was on, and I did look CUTE in it. After about 10 minutes in it, the back started irritating me, though, so I undid the hooks and gave it another go.
Again, you have to be a contortionist to get this damned thing hooked up! My shoulders popped, my elbows creaked, and I bent myself almost completely backward trying to fasten the hooks and eyes in the back. I only managed to hook the top hook into the bottom eye, which was even worse than missing the second one altogether previously, so I tried again.
After about 10 more minutes of fiddling with it, I gave up and decided that I would need help is I was ever to wear the thing properly. Then again, if I ever decide to wear it anywhere, I will need a peeing buddy.
Perhaps, though, there is a method by which one could hook everything up BEFORE putting it on? I doubt it.
Saturday, February 28, 2009
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
Recording!
Tuesday we were in the studio, and managed to capture drum tracks for five of the 11 songs. I had hoped to get more done, but, it is what it is. Looking back, things didn't go as badly as I perceived them as going while it was happening. I had to remind myself this morning that this is how recording sometimes goes; no band - professional, indie, major label or not - comes out with a finished CD in just 8 hours.
So, we're on the right track and will be back to recording next Thursday!
So, we're on the right track and will be back to recording next Thursday!
Sunday, February 15, 2009
Your Media, Your Airwaves, Your Voice
You'll notice that, in the sidebar to the left, that I have put in a new widget. It is a poll to give our opinions about the most important aspects that need to be addressed by President Obama's FCC chairperson.
It iws important that you vote and let your voice be heard. If you're tired of the pro-corporate bias in the media that has nothing to do with your real concerns for this country and what matters to you... if you are tired of the spin and propaganda that make these things that are only good for big business look like the benefit you and your concerns... if you would like to keep the Internet free for all to use without preference to which corporation can pay the most ('Net Neutrality), then please, take this poll. The airwaves are yours. They do not belong to the government, any media owner, or any corporation. They belong to the American people. Let's take them back.
It iws important that you vote and let your voice be heard. If you're tired of the pro-corporate bias in the media that has nothing to do with your real concerns for this country and what matters to you... if you are tired of the spin and propaganda that make these things that are only good for big business look like the benefit you and your concerns... if you would like to keep the Internet free for all to use without preference to which corporation can pay the most ('Net Neutrality), then please, take this poll. The airwaves are yours. They do not belong to the government, any media owner, or any corporation. They belong to the American people. Let's take them back.
It Doesn't Rain...
...but it pours.
(Yes, I am re-using the title from my MySpace blog. Because I am being lazy.)
Anyway, so after the awful events of last week, one might think that nothing else really bad could happen here, but IT DID!
This morning, my cat, Cajun, demolished my brand new bag of bagels right in front of the bedroom door. Cajun had bounded through the bedroom, over the bed, and back out. Well, Cajun NEVER comes in the bedroom, so I should have found that odd.
Well, I got up, went to the bathroom, and then went into the kitchen to get the broom to clean up the bagel carnage off the dining room floor, where, apparently, the bagel destruction had started. I had just finished sweeping it up when I smelled heat and heard some crackling. My eyes were instantly drawn to the chimney, and, sure as shit, the wall around the chimney was on fire!
The fire started in the chimney, apparently from the bricks getting really hot and catching the drywall on fire. At one point, I guess, the stove was on the other side of the partition between the dining room and livingroom, but the chimney access was closed off by a metal (aluminum, maybe?) plate when they moved the stove to the livingroom side of the partition. Where the plate was in the wall was where the fire was burning.
Sprayed the fire with a spray bottle, putting it mostly out. I called out to the kids and got them to get dressed and go out to the car where they would be warm with the heater and all. Then, I called 911. For whatever reason, I got a hold of Pend Oreille County, and they had to re-route me to Bonner County. I reported the fire, told them that it was pretty much out but that we didn't know if it was in the walls or not. So, they were on there way. Then, I unloaded everything off my piano (my 121-year-old player piano... you know, the one my Dad bought me) and went outside myself to wave the firetrucks into the house. It was a good thing I did, because they were all over the place, completely lost. But they finally got here and looked at everything with a thermal camera to make sure that the fire was out. (Apparently, this thing is sensitive enough to see footprints on carpet when you're wearing shoes.) The fire was out, but they pried off the paneling and drywall where the fire had been.
While the firemen were here, I was in the car with the kids, getting worried and wondering how much damage there would be when I got back inside. Luckily, the firemen had moved my piano out of the way, so it only got some soot and a little water on it. Soon after, the firefighters left, and I got to clean everything up. Some of the family came over and helped move the piano back against the wall, but away from where the fire had been so that repairs could be made.
So, now, we have to wait for the chimney repair guy to come over and decide how much it'll be to repair it. We can't run the pellet stove until then, so it is pretty cold in here. Dad may come over later and take the kids to his place until we have the heat back on.
I had to cancel a meeting I had scheduled for a web site, and who knows how practice will go tomorrow without any heat. But Cajun was today's hero. If he hadn't eaten my bagels and acted like an idiot, the fire might have spread to the ceiling (the kids' rooms' floor) and we might all be dead. So, I gave Cajun a can of tuna. He earned it.
(Yes, I am re-using the title from my MySpace blog. Because I am being lazy.)
Anyway, so after the awful events of last week, one might think that nothing else really bad could happen here, but IT DID!
This morning, my cat, Cajun, demolished my brand new bag of bagels right in front of the bedroom door. Cajun had bounded through the bedroom, over the bed, and back out. Well, Cajun NEVER comes in the bedroom, so I should have found that odd.
Well, I got up, went to the bathroom, and then went into the kitchen to get the broom to clean up the bagel carnage off the dining room floor, where, apparently, the bagel destruction had started. I had just finished sweeping it up when I smelled heat and heard some crackling. My eyes were instantly drawn to the chimney, and, sure as shit, the wall around the chimney was on fire!
The fire started in the chimney, apparently from the bricks getting really hot and catching the drywall on fire. At one point, I guess, the stove was on the other side of the partition between the dining room and livingroom, but the chimney access was closed off by a metal (aluminum, maybe?) plate when they moved the stove to the livingroom side of the partition. Where the plate was in the wall was where the fire was burning.
Sprayed the fire with a spray bottle, putting it mostly out. I called out to the kids and got them to get dressed and go out to the car where they would be warm with the heater and all. Then, I called 911. For whatever reason, I got a hold of Pend Oreille County, and they had to re-route me to Bonner County. I reported the fire, told them that it was pretty much out but that we didn't know if it was in the walls or not. So, they were on there way. Then, I unloaded everything off my piano (my 121-year-old player piano... you know, the one my Dad bought me) and went outside myself to wave the firetrucks into the house. It was a good thing I did, because they were all over the place, completely lost. But they finally got here and looked at everything with a thermal camera to make sure that the fire was out. (Apparently, this thing is sensitive enough to see footprints on carpet when you're wearing shoes.) The fire was out, but they pried off the paneling and drywall where the fire had been.
While the firemen were here, I was in the car with the kids, getting worried and wondering how much damage there would be when I got back inside. Luckily, the firemen had moved my piano out of the way, so it only got some soot and a little water on it. Soon after, the firefighters left, and I got to clean everything up. Some of the family came over and helped move the piano back against the wall, but away from where the fire had been so that repairs could be made.
So, now, we have to wait for the chimney repair guy to come over and decide how much it'll be to repair it. We can't run the pellet stove until then, so it is pretty cold in here. Dad may come over later and take the kids to his place until we have the heat back on.
I had to cancel a meeting I had scheduled for a web site, and who knows how practice will go tomorrow without any heat. But Cajun was today's hero. If he hadn't eaten my bagels and acted like an idiot, the fire might have spread to the ceiling (the kids' rooms' floor) and we might all be dead. So, I gave Cajun a can of tuna. He earned it.
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
LTD Damage
I am tired and I don't want to be doing anything...Monday afternoon, Kenny went to serve some papers up north of where Mom & Dad live... somewhere on Jackpine Flats or something. Anyway, so he serves the papers (and he had taken Dad with him), and he is heading back out when he comes to this hill on the one-lane road. Two cars are stopped in the middle of the road, so Kenny stops and waits for them, and then the cars leave. Kenny goes to go up this hill, and the road is icy. He can't get up it, so he starts to back down. The car slides sideways in the rear-end, and Kenny gets my LTD stuck. Yes, he is driving MY car.
So, they try to wiggle the car back and forth for a few minutes, and finally decide that it is well and truly stuck, so Dad goes walking to a nearby house to borrow a shovel. As Dad is walking away, Kenny keeps trying to get the car moving by going forward and then backward. While he is looking backward, a car comes over the top of the hill, starts slipping on the ice and hits my car head-on.
Now, nobody is hurt, I should say that now.
No BODY is hurt, except the body of my car.
The lady who hit the car was driving a two-day-old Suburban. You slide a lot faster than you roll, especially downhill, and, rather than take the ditch, she hit my car right on the passenger side front fender's corner. It DEMOLISHED the fender, the headline rim, the bumper, and all the chrome and lights around the fender - except the headlights... those still work. The impact crunched the fender over the hood, so the hood can't be opened, and jammed the fender back into the passenger door, so that can't be opened, either. Here are some pictures of the damage:
(click for larger views)
So, I am very upset. Kenny did not get the woman's temporary license number. He did not get her VIN number or her driver's license number. At least, with his P.I. business he could look some of that up, but he didn't even walk to a nearby house and ask to use the phone. He did walk to a nearby house and get them to pull the car out.
The only semi-bright side to this is that she REALLY damaged her Suburban by hitting my car. Apparently, it mashed the radiator into her engine and broke oil and fuel lines and it was not driveable.
Kenny talked to my Uncle Rick (who fixes car body damage), and he talked to our insurance company, and the woman's insurance company, and made a police report. We looked up the blue book value on the car - which, I figure, is somewhere between "average" and "excellent" condition - and my LTD is probably worth somewhere between $6,500 and $9,000 with the 429 in it. But I still figure that her insurance company will lowball it and total my car for what I paid for it: $1,400. I am GOING to get SCREWED on this; I know it.
So, that pretty much ruined my week.
So, they try to wiggle the car back and forth for a few minutes, and finally decide that it is well and truly stuck, so Dad goes walking to a nearby house to borrow a shovel. As Dad is walking away, Kenny keeps trying to get the car moving by going forward and then backward. While he is looking backward, a car comes over the top of the hill, starts slipping on the ice and hits my car head-on.
Now, nobody is hurt, I should say that now.
No BODY is hurt, except the body of my car.
The lady who hit the car was driving a two-day-old Suburban. You slide a lot faster than you roll, especially downhill, and, rather than take the ditch, she hit my car right on the passenger side front fender's corner. It DEMOLISHED the fender, the headline rim, the bumper, and all the chrome and lights around the fender - except the headlights... those still work. The impact crunched the fender over the hood, so the hood can't be opened, and jammed the fender back into the passenger door, so that can't be opened, either. Here are some pictures of the damage:
(click for larger views)
So, I am very upset. Kenny did not get the woman's temporary license number. He did not get her VIN number or her driver's license number. At least, with his P.I. business he could look some of that up, but he didn't even walk to a nearby house and ask to use the phone. He did walk to a nearby house and get them to pull the car out.
The only semi-bright side to this is that she REALLY damaged her Suburban by hitting my car. Apparently, it mashed the radiator into her engine and broke oil and fuel lines and it was not driveable.
Kenny talked to my Uncle Rick (who fixes car body damage), and he talked to our insurance company, and the woman's insurance company, and made a police report. We looked up the blue book value on the car - which, I figure, is somewhere between "average" and "excellent" condition - and my LTD is probably worth somewhere between $6,500 and $9,000 with the 429 in it. But I still figure that her insurance company will lowball it and total my car for what I paid for it: $1,400. I am GOING to get SCREWED on this; I know it.
So, that pretty much ruined my week.
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
Projects
Today, I finished a pain-in-the-keister project, got most of my school books for the "B" semester that starts in March, and bought some awesome chocolate scented body scrub and body wash. They are The. Awesomest.
I am so looking forward to recording and FINALLY working with TRUE professionals who know what they're doing and FINALLY capture MY awesomeness and my songs' awesomeness and my band's awesomeness.
Because we are AWESOME!
I am so looking forward to recording and FINALLY working with TRUE professionals who know what they're doing and FINALLY capture MY awesomeness and my songs' awesomeness and my band's awesomeness.
Because we are AWESOME!
Monday, February 2, 2009
STEELERS WIN!!!
HEY!!!! The Steelers won the Superbowl!!! I'm not going to Disney World, but I am happy!! The first team in NFL history to six Superbowl titles!!! Too awesome for words!!!
About half the people I invited ditched me at the last minute, but, oh, well. Life goes on. I have a ton of leftovers. Heh.
Anyways, not much going on other than that... now, I have to go do school work and some real work. Tomorrow, I start exercising again (oh, joy). Also tomorrow, I am getting my new desk, so, no more painful neck spasms and stuff. It should be awesome!
I sent the kids away to Mom's for the week so I could get all my school projects done and out of the way so I can focus on the recording. Should be a peaceful, if busy, week.
About half the people I invited ditched me at the last minute, but, oh, well. Life goes on. I have a ton of leftovers. Heh.
Anyways, not much going on other than that... now, I have to go do school work and some real work. Tomorrow, I start exercising again (oh, joy). Also tomorrow, I am getting my new desk, so, no more painful neck spasms and stuff. It should be awesome!
I sent the kids away to Mom's for the week so I could get all my school projects done and out of the way so I can focus on the recording. Should be a peaceful, if busy, week.
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